Because People WANT to know....

I agreed (could also be interpreted as BEGGED) for my friend, Chris ,at My Two Cents to include me in the interview phenomenon that has shaken the blogger world! And he agreed....he likes me! He really, really likes me!!! The plague of questions started here. So Chris has now sent me a series of 5 questions that I have to create some lies about....oops, did I say that out loud? I'll be totally honest in my answers....as long as they don't make me look too bad.

1. What one choice in your past would you go back and change now, if you could?
That would be dating a man who was 16 years my senior when I was only 19 years old. I felt sooooo completely thrilled that someone of 'his stature' would be interested in little ol' me. I was sure that he would leave his wife/family for me (in my defense, he did tell me that he was legally separated), and he would sweep me off into the sunset and marry me. Turns out he was just a perv who apparently liked young, virginal (hahaha....my virginity was a distant memory at that point) perky gals who enjoyed the attentions of older men and therefore 'gave it up' fairly easily. The other regret that goes along with this? The man in question worked for my mom at a local satellite college. I didn't win "Daughter of the Year" at that point in my life.

2. If you had to leave your current home tomorrow, where would you relocate to?
I've always enjoyed the full four seasons, which is one reason why Michigan has really been a great place to live. We pretty much get 3 full months of winter, spring, summer, fall...and I have things that I love (and hate) about each season. HOWEVER, if I had to relocate I would choose: 1. North Carolina ,or 2.) Colorado ,or 3.) England (because I want to visit pubs, say things like "bloody hell", "wanker", "sod off", and "The Queen is coming over for tea".

3. You are given 1 million dollars and you must spend it all within six hours, how do you complete your mission?
6 hours to spend 1 million dollars???? PUH-LEASE! This is soooooo not a problem for me. I'd buy a big ass house, by tons of furniture to decorate said big ass house, have a fun splurge at Tiffany's, buy four new cars (one for each season), and book a few exotic vacations. Oh...and I'd also get a personal shopper to buy me a ton of clothes.
Hmmm....I've just noticed that not one single charity is listed (do the words selfish and narcissitic come to mind?) ....okay....I'd give a wad of money to one of the local pet sanctuaries here in Grand Rapids. Oh...and I might give some to my family....if they were nice to me.

4. Which is more likely to happen in your lifetime:
a. Sasquatch is discovered ~ What do you mean "discovered"? There's been actual photographic footage of a hairy beast in the wilds of Canada. He lives people! He lives!!!! I suppose you're going to try to convince me that the LochNess Monster is a load of crap too? I read National Enquirer when I'm in the grocery line....I know about the world!
b. Aliens land at the White House ~ They already did....their race is called Bushies and the came from the Planet Total Fuck Up.
c. Jesus returns and the rapture sucks up the faithful ~ At this point, I don't think Jesus is coming anywhere near us....there aren't enough faithful to make it worth His while.

5. You must choose one ethnic type of food to eat for the rest of your life, what is it? ~ That would have to be Italian.....love, love, love Italian food. Plus then I can become a short, rotund lady who everyone fears (because of a short temper), pays homage to (buy offing anyone who pisses me off), and can drink loads of wine because it's 'good for you'. And even better? I can use words like Ciao! and not sound like a wanna-be. Oh, and that finger kissing to describe yummy stuff would look a lot more authentic than when I do it now.

So....do you want to play???? If so...follow these directions:
1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions. I get to pick the questions. (You need to give me your email address by the way)
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.
You must also:
link back to the original post (http://immoralmatriarch.com/questionsagain) and also to my post
(http://worldaccordingtojewelz.blogspot.com/2009/01/because-people-want-to-know.html)